mayvaneday/poetry/e/earthbound.txt

earthbound
2021-01-01

***

before, in your grief, you declare
"my time on this earth is done; I have no more need for air"
just remember how you swore to with your own hands the heavens tear

desperate to return to Imaginai
where your loved ones and your life purpose reside
safe from your jailers in that place called the Outside

you call your bed a garden and dig yourself a hole
planting yourself, never fearing the cold
and wait for Kidasuna's oblivion to take hold

you are a divine dragon, a vagrant, a shooting star
but even the most powerful never got very far
without a well-planned script to use (or even a single page)
as they pranced about what we felt was life but forgot was just a stage

others who have sat in therapist chairs
have passed through hypnosis and desperate prayers
to come to the conclusion that, at the end of glittering tunnel,
we allow ourselves to be ground up together in Demiurge's funnel

you survived the hell of being assaulted with implanted whims
from pornsick people who wanted to tear off your limbs
so glance at your palms that will gladly never know ablation
and decide on your own twisted path to salvation

the right hand path, where you slaughter what in you is odd
and go to your death subsumed into God
or left hand path, where exists no such thing as sin
and meet every tyrant with mocking laughter and grin

you ball your fists. "how am I supposed to choose
when one day, everything I own, I will lose?
my life's work, my art, my pain, my writing-
am I supposed to just turn my back and bide it all good tidings?"

Azure would have something to say about that
born as your tulpa, soon packed his sacks
he took off on his own with the Fellarstellen
two paths open under your feet, woven light streaming golden

to the left, like breast's acne, infected with hate
you choose to endlessly as a human reincarnate
and find yourself, continue on, over and over again
until the heavens that trapped you here meet their own end

to the right, you accept that your soul's fate is apotheosis
and go gently into what Mori's- your former- siblings claimed was bliss:
you unleash this world inside you, no matter how hollow
and while you yourself may cease, a trillion souls will follow

dear child, your curtain call is plain to see:
will you disintegrate and become a new galaxy?
or will you find the "soul council" and tear it all down?
are you right-foot heaven-sent or left-foot earthbound?

***

CC BY-NC-SA 4.0 (c) Vane Vander